Being Love & Bringing Love

She sat in the big brown recliner in her dimly lit apartment asking herself questions. Wondering what happened. Why she found herself alone. There was no easy answer. There was no understanding it. She had been asking the same questions for years.

She had it all, a great apartment, money in her pocket, wonderful personality and still there she was by herself. Why? It’s not like she did not have opportunities to get married. She had plenty of dates and attractions but nothing ever panned out and if it did it ended in lies, betrayal even cheating on their part.

As she sat on that comfortable chair being very uncomfortable she did not understand her situation but she began to accept where things were in her life. To continue to struggle against the evidence only caused heartache. Perhaps the love she had was not for a particular person but it was for many people in a bigger broader way.

How does one accept that opportunity to really be about loving the ones you’re with at any given time? How does one love that perfectly? The more she looked at her dilemma as an opportunity to do and be about her spiritual calling, a calmness took over. She exhaled for the first time deeply letting go of the why and how come. She settled into this is what she now knew about herself. This, loving others was the answer. That somehow fit.

At least for now she could walk out this part of her destiny calmer, having acceptance, at peace, being love and bringing love to the world around her. Imperfect as she knew she was she also knew that kind of perfect love could only be given to her from a Higher Source, God. It could not come from any other place.

Exposed Loving 💙, 5.6.17

The Fragrance of Their Last Spring

Out the window she stared for what seemed to be more than a few hours. Her eyes were fixed on a location she was not looking at but she was intently focused just the same.

Memories danced around in her head of two childhood friends no cares in the world, everything to look forward to and fears about the unknown boogeyman man under the bed. The memories flooded her internal vision; movies of real time events played.

They had played in the garden even as two adults she remembered having fun on a particular spring day. The smell of blossoms and the earth replenishing itself. She stared on.

Later that day they sat in a coffee shop. Others were present but they were in their own world making plans for tomorrow. They would be a shared future for them.

She remembered Alyssa. Time, distance, death, the bigotry of others and the prejudice of her family could never erase the love that had pierced her heart many years ago when some told them they were too young to have experienced, never mind having had any real knowledge of love.

On occasion she finds herself back at that same window intently staring at a fixed location, eyes wide open with her heart recalling the fragrance of that last spring.

Exposed Loving 💙, 5.4.17