Short Story: “After Thirteen Years”

This was the second time Suzanne’s heart was beating fast just like it had when they first met. That afternoon was ordinary but rich with possibilities. As Denise walked by, her tethered sweater wrapped around her waist gently touched Suzanne’s arm. But it was not the touch that caused her to look up, it was Denise’s scent that touched her senses indescribably.

The combination of sweet and spicy sprinkled in patchouli sent a heat rushing through her body. It was an uncommon experience for her just like their romance in the years to come would be. But this afternoon as she sat alone in a dimmed room of the apartment they shared that became their home, Suzanne had thoughts that raged within her, a tortured conflict of “I should leave her but I can not see my life without her” lingered. Suzanne’s mind swirled and ached provoking sadness because the only real possibility was having to let Denise go after 13 years.

Suzanne recalled finding the letters that were written to Denise from another woman. Denise was sentimental about certain things like important letters and gifts. She hung onto them forever. The letters were full of graphic passion and words of love that they had shared and hoped to share again. The letters went back five years and were never sent to their home but delivered at Denise’s work address. Even worse was the letter that Suzanne found that Denise had written to her lover but had not yet mailed. That letter was the dagger that cut Suzanne’s flesh deep piercing her heart written 28 hours ago.

© Exposed Loving, 6.14.18

A Dedicated Poem: Healing of Her Heart

The night filled with her
struggles trying to understand
eliminating the darkness
that scarred her heart.

It wakes with her and then
tucks her in again. The teddy
bear does not keep her comforted, does not take away the fear that has grown to adult status in what seems a very short time tormenting her inside out.

You don’t know if you can reach
outside of yourself to speak what your inside is screaming “I don’t know who I am” , “I don’t know how to stand”. The pain of the hurt speaks.

Does anyone hear her confusion, can someone interpret her silence translating the imprinted pain that has stained her open heart creating calloused arteries.

Listen, you will hear her.
Be still with her and you will feel her. Let her tell her story in the way she can with her hand in yours stand.

Witness who she was, who she
is and what the pain of her fear wants to reveal about her future.

Be by her side, hoping, loving and connecting until she can
recall who she truly is and who
she has always been.

Be there for her between her
words as she speaks her healing
bringing life back into her heart pumping richness, her courage and strength reviving what she thought was lost.

Be there for her as she walks
out of the forest into the
expansiveness of reality tasting the sweetness of hope in LOVE
once more.

Exposed Loving💙, 4.5.17

Poem: The Woes of Things Undone

My heart bursts with each wave of emotion lived in the not living given what I have left undone.
Choices escaping my grasp as I walk past what could have been but was not back then.

The pain of leaving things undone will alway come sometimes unannounced wishful thinking in every ounce.

More memories created, desires never satiated, hope slowly faded but still living despite what’s been stated.

Exposed Loving 💙, 8.22.17

Sensuality of the Senses

What if a person treated touch as a precious action only to be indulged when the language of “in love” is spoken, heard and received.

What if looking into someone’s eyes past the point of a friendly gesture would be allowed only to get the attention of someone you want to know much deeper than surface, much longer than a lifetime.

What if tasting was seen as a sacred feast only to be had with the one who has captured your heart for eternity.

What if hearing the voice of the one you love was like a serenade, an offering given to you reminding you of a warm summer night experiencing the cool sprinkling of a beautiful fountain.

What if the fragrance of someone caught your attention devastating your senses with the fresh scent of baked cookies,

bacon, grits and eggs cooked to perfection; they smell like home.

Why not save the sensuality of the senses for the one who knows more about you than those who were the closest to you, that person makes you smile from your eyes to your cheeks and holds you through every hard time and every exuberant celebration.

Exposed Loving 💙 8.7.17